Oldriska Balouskova, 6
Interview with Oldriska Balouskova
Meditation is allowing "what is" to be. It is not about getting anywhere other than where you are right now. To meditate is to be right here right now, to feel what you feel, regardless of what it is. It is not about trying to feel something different. Nature is a wonderful teacher of presence. Meditating in nature, listening to its sounds, meditating while watching trees– all this can be very helpful. Bring awareness to everything you are doing– meditate while brushing your teeth or washing the dishes, for example.
Thank you. This has brought up an interesting question for me, so here it goes. You speak of meditation as allowing "what is" to be". My cynical mind responds with... "What is" by its very nature is already being, so what does it matter if I allow it, or not? How could I disallow "what is"?
That is a great question. Of course what is already is regardless of whether you allow it or not but it makes a difference to your state of being– if you do not "allow"/accept it, you are in resistance and that is what you will experience.
I have one more question. This may seem redundant, but I have to ask. How exactly do we go about this art of allowing? What does allowing mean? What is it in particular that makes the difference between allowing and resisting?
It is hard to answer that question verbally because for me, it happens so much on the level of feeling open versus contracted. I will get back to you if and when more words come to me regarding this question.
I understand. It is an extremely subtle dynamic in our experience that makes room for allowing. I feel that we are sharing much clarity on this subject so I want to venture deeper into it. It's quite possible that we have gone as far as we can with words.
My reasoning is that for those who have yet to embrace this art of allowing (to feel what you feel) it might be helpful to know what makes this so important difference. Perhaps another way to get at this subtle behavioral dynamic is to look instead at how we habitually disallow. I think it may have something to do with projection, denial and fear– the fear of encountering oneself.
Perhaps it has something to do with the willingness to see self– see anything, for that matter. This is your interview, and I don't want to put words out there that are not in keeping with your sense of all of this. Do you think it has something to do with this willingness to pay attention– just this subtle wish to encounter self?
It definitely has to do with the willingness to truly feel all that I am– the whole of the universe– not to resist any part of it. It is not Oldriska waking up– it is the universe waking up to itself– and it feels amazing. The allowing is so much about feeling myself as the universe– feeling the vibration of the universe– and us communicating about this feels so much part of this– of the universe waking up to itself. I hope this makes sense– I am feeling that vibration pretty strongly now.
Is there anything that you do to help this happen? If, by contrast, there is a way that someone can retard or prevent this process, what is that they do? And so, what is it that you do instead to help? This same effort makes us both serious and impermeable, does it not? With motive we are not in receptivity but instead wish to alter what needs no altering. Still, I don’t believe checking in necessarily requires effort– perhaps just an awareness. Perhaps your "bringing attention" is the dropping of effort.